Adoption Journal #18

One year ago this week (actually a year and five days ago) Mandy and I sat in an orientation session for prospective adoptive/foster parents with our local county social service agency. We did this after months of prayer research into the topic and issue of adoption. As I have said before, we received mixed reactions when we told people that we were intent on adopting. Prior to ever setting foot in the orientation we were convinced that God was directing us as a couple to enter this world on faith. Now few people (even Christians) accept the answer of a decision being God’s will when they ask “why?” I appreciate this, but it doesn’t change the answer. More particularly Mandy and I were convinced that God was directing us to the Foster/Adopt track through our local county social service agency for a child known to have developmental or medical disabilities. Knowing this was going to be somewhat more difficult (in regards to time and emotional risk) than perhaps an international or private agency adoption, we have still pursued this path over the past year.
A year into this process and I begin to wonder how much longer it will be. Because of the dual nature of being approved through county adoptions and foster care this process is time consuming. Further, since some classes are only offered once every few months a missed window of opportunity can cost at least three months (this has been true for us). Now people who originally were supportive are beginning to questions whether or not we thought this whole thing through. Many people were excited and even thought that Mandy and I were so great to be following God’s lead; however, their thinking does not allow for hardship or wait when following God’s lead. Yet, this is exactly what we find in the Bible. Even now in the hardship and frustration I know there is purpose. Even now without my son or daughter I can look at the county child welfare system and echo Joseph’s words “You meant these bureaucratic hoops for evil, but God meant them for good (granted that is a bit paraphrased from Genesis).” I can’t begin to count the people we have run into who were on the fence about whether or not to pursue adoption of foster care who have allowed us to be an influence and a guide in this journey. I must say that there are countless more who have affirmed us and supported our journey through their prayer and constant encouragements, we are truly blessed by these. There is truly a reason for the struggles in this world.
There have been temptations for Mandy and I to go ahead and pursue a biological child first then later pursue an adoption. More than a few have suggested we do this. Yet, I remember what happened when Abraham stepped outside God’s plan for creating his family and the disastrous consequence of his impatience. A year is a long time to wait, but I know that God will continue to be faithful. I know that God’s faithfulness does not have an expiration date or needs to be renewed like a library card. God’s faithfulness is equal to whatever the situation. And for that I am grateful.

Adoption Journal #17

Well, Mandy and I went to our Foster Care Application Workshop the other evening in order to complete the requirements by Orange County soial services. We sat for three hours listening to the rules, regulations and expectations of the Foster Care branch of OC SSA. Much of what we heard was disheartening, and some contradicted things we had previously heard.We were told that Foster Care has a 120 day timeline once receiving our application. (Mind you we have already completed an Adoption application, 27 hours of parenting classes, 8 hours of First-Aid CPR, and 16 hours of further adoption classes over the past 12 months). Previously our county adoption worker had informed us to wait until we had completed our Birdge Builder classes (further adoption classes beyond th 27 hour PRIDE/parenting training) to submit our Foster application. She informed us that once our application was submitted that things would move quickly and that it was best to have everything completed. Now we find out that we could have submitted this three or four months ago and began the 120 day timeline, which would mean tha we would have our foster license now and be done with our requirements. Now we may need to wait another 4 months because we received some bad input. Further, the fact that our apartment complex has a pool and a little stream might delay us, according to the licensing worker we met with the other evening.All of this was a bit of a downer as we had begun to get excited with the painting of our child's room and the anticipation that it was a matter of weeks. Now it looks like things will take even longer. We pray that red-tape is cut and that the process goes a much-much-much quicker than expected.Overall, not a great week on the Adoption front. Again we are reminded that the system is broken. OC Social Service Adoptions and Foster Care (we have to go through both divisions to get a child) both require fingerprinting. Now Mandy and I have nothing to hide, but it seems a bit ridiculous to spend the money and effort for two sets of fingerprints when their offices are only separated by a couple inches of wood and plaster. This is just another example of the bureaucratic mechanism that makes it difficult for good people to take care of kids who need homes. It shouldn't be so hard.